Dissed by Fwend

"ESPN.COM

December 30, 2008, 10:59 AM ET

According to a San Jose Mercury News report on Monday, Warriors guard Stephen Jackson said that his friend expressed a desire to return to the Bay Area where he played for parts of four seasons.

"That's all we talked about," Jackson said, according to the newspaper. "I went to his house, spent some time with his mom and his grandmother. He wants to come back. And if he wants to come back, I want him back."

__________________________

December 30, 2008, 6:46 PM ET

Baron Davis and Stephen Jackson appear to have taken away different interpretations from their get-together during the weekend.

According to a San Jose Mercury News report in Monday's editions, Jackson, a guard with the Golden State Warriors, said that close friend Davis, now with the Los Angeles Clippers, expressed a desire to return to the Bay Area, where he played for parts of four seasons.

Davis, however, on Monday refuted that notion, telling the Los Angeles Times: "No, I don't want out."

"I don't know what Stephen Jackson got from my conversation. That never came out of my mouth," Davis told the Times at Monday's workout. "

19

Worth the 12 bucks.




3. Chasing Pavements
9. Make You Feel My Love

Joy Enriquez

Joy Enriquez and family, came into my work today.



She used to be a pop diva and then she transitioned into Contemporary Christian. I don't think she's produced any albums recently.... not that I know of at least. And I would know. Cuz I'm TMZ incarnate.

Anyways, I recognized her husband, Rodney Jerkins first. They came in with their baby boy, and their abuelita! Such a beautiful family!

I was ringing them up and as any nonsensical person would do, I whispered "I know who you are. You're Joy Enriquez. I saw your wedding on VH1" (huge smile on my face). She was so sweet with me though and said thank you and teased her husband about it. I remember their wedding. It was over 2 milli. Rodney Jerkins makes some major cash.

You're Out of My League!!!

My favorite Foodnetwork chef is, hands down, knees bucking... Tyler Florence.

Host of the show Tyler's Ultimate, he's a typical, personable and dynamic celebrity chef but I especially love the food that he makes- it's always something hearty, something traditional. Episodes always focus on one main dish, Tyler's Ultimate... Pot Roast, Tyler's Ultimate... Fish Tacos, etc. I recreated a Swedish Meatball recipe from his holiday special and they were SO good...So good I squealed to myself.

Aside from the food he makes, the man is a hunk. Behind his build is a lot of energy, confidence, and saavy. He's the guy that always knows what he's doing and what he's saying. And that is so very attractive. Does that make sense? I wish I knew what I was doing. Even right now. What the heck am I doing??? blogging about a schmancy pants from Mill Valley.

Anyways, Tyler Florence probably lives an amazing life, and that is also very attractive. I know this because I read his blog! hey! how 'bout that.

I stalk you.

I hope everyone seeks out amazing things, experiences, and people in life. Eat great food as well.

Ciao! (Tomorrow is Armani Exchange's semi-annual Ciao sale. Everything is nearly 70% off. I thank the retail gods that I don't have to close)

Christmas 2008

Christmas is so anti-climactic.

I don't know what to do with myself now that the day is almost over.

This Christmas my mom installed a new heating blanket for me so I couldn't get out of bed until 12:30 in the afternoon. I know its cold in Norcal and Inland, but its cold here by the beach too. I absolutely hate wearing socks and hoodies in the house. Its itchy and scratchy.

For the past three days I've been making a fuss about watching Benjamin Button with my family for the movie's opening today. Curse the stars because it was completely sold out all day. Instead my sister and I watched Bedtime Stories and had a Denny's dinner. I want to marry Adam Sandler. I also want to marry country fried steak and gravy.

While Christmas felt unusual and undeservingly empty this year, I'm glad I was still went to Christmas Eve service at my church. Sometimes there are moments in my life when I completely lose grasp of what real worship is - the kind that God deserves. It was so good to be in his presence again and give reverence to Jesus OUR KING. The message: Isaiah 7-10, written 700 years before Christ's birth.

6 For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given,
and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

I got into a bad car accident Christmas Eve as well. Please pray for me. My mind and heart are racing.

Wedding

My stepsister is getting married...



I'm so blessed to have my unni in my life! I've learned so much from her, especially about relationships. Its been a rocky journey. She has had three serious relationships during her 7 years out of high school, each of which, I had all thought to be hubbies-to-be. When I was in high school, my sister's boyfriends would always be over at the house, bbqing with us on weekends, drinking with my parents, walking the dogs at the lake. I remember hoping I could have what she had. Even in the times when she was miserable for months over a lost relationship, I remember wondering if I could ever feel that way about someone. In retrospect, I regret wishing that upon myself. One thing I've learned from is that you can always flee a storm, but you can never control one. Let the storm pass.

But wow, love is amazing when its respectful and pure. I'm so happy that my sister has found someone deserving of her commitment and her amazing energy! She is so much fun and such an extroadinary person!!!

Pictures from the proposal.

Groom on the left, my brother on the right.



The pool near the lake in our complex. Trail of tealights and roses

One Art

One Art

The art of losing isn't hard to master;
so many things seem filled with the intent
to be lost that their loss is no disaster.

Lose something every day. Accept the fluster
of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

Then practice losing farther, losing faster:
places, and names, and where it was you meant
to travel. None of these will bring disaster.

I lost my mother's watch. And look! my last, or
next-to-last, of three loved houses went.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

I lost two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster,
some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent.
I miss them, but it wasn't a disaster.

---Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture
I love) I shan't have lied. It's evident
the art of losing's not too hard to master
though it may look like (Write it!) like disaster.

-- Elizabeth Bishop

i carry your heart with me

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in
my heart) i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate (for you are my fate,my sweet) i want
no world (for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life ; which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart)

- ee cummings

I can't stop watching the trailer for this

Right here what we gon' do is go back

Erykah Badu - Love Of My Life (An Ode To Hip Hop)
Erykah-Badu

I love Sanaa Lathan. She's so gorgeous and talented. I still don't know how to pronounce her name though. I saw Brown Sugar on TV and it reminded me of how much I love Erykah Badu's Love Of My Life. Brown Sugar, Love and Basketball, they all have the same story about friends stumbling into romantic territory. Good movies to watch alone. and for me, cry alone.

I'm at Panera's, working on my Ethics of Pro Bono service paper. I just took out my earplugs to be with the world again. Across from me is a group of 6 Europeans who I assume to be grad students. First, I'm very distracted by the manner by which they are eating their sammies. They don't move their bodies when they chew, and seems like they have more chews per bite than we appear to do. It's making me hungry again, even though I've just finished my dinner. Second, I can't help but eavesdrop on everything they're saying. Not that what they're saying is particularly interesting but I find their matter-of-fact tone easy on the ears. But to top it off, I can't help but stare at this one guy who is wearing a really fruity knit sweater with stripes going down the arms - ATLANTA runs across his chest. Represent.

My favorite tea

Solomon

"So I was great, and increased more than all that were before me in Jerusalem: also my wisdom remained with me. And whatsoever mine eyes desired I kept not from them, I withheld not my heart from any joy; for my heart rejoiced in all my labour: and this was my portion of all my labour. Then I looked on all the works that my hands had wrought, and on the labour that I had laboured to do: and, behold, all was vanity and vexation of spirit, and there was no profit under the sun."

Super Random

I'm too lazy to get up and grab a glass of water, so I swallowed my pills with diet coke instead.

I watched my first Liza Minnelli movie today called The Sterile Cuckoo (1969). I loved it. Why do all great actresses look nuts when they hit 70? (ie. Elizabeth Taylor)



...better known as Booster's "girlfriend", Lucille, on Arrested Development.
also referenced in the movie School of Rock by the sassy costume kid when asked who his role model was. I know this because I've memorized all the lines from the movie.

And on the topic of role models, I saw Role Models over the weekend! Loved it, but wish I didn't love it. Crude humor is definitely wearing off though. It doesn't make me laugh anymore. I think I'm becoming a lady, maybe.

Black Friday Shopping

Our family went to Fry's for black-friday shopping, except we went on Saturday at 5pm, not 5am. We are lazy shoppers.

Big purchases included, a new laptop for me, a new family digital camera (on sale for 197 from 329), and three laptop cooling pads (2.99 each). The cooling pads were declared sold out as of Friday morning, but my mom threatened a 19 year old salesguy and he managed to get us three from the back!

Friday I also worked a 9 hour shift at Armani, and sold a total $2,421 dollars worth of clothes. For Paris Hilton that may be worth a purse. But for the rest of us, that is, for lack of better words, a lot. I do not spend more than 20 bucks on shirts/blouses or more than 40 on jeans and skirts. Anything of mine that is namebrand is probably a handmedown or from Lohmanns.

Thanksgiving is officially over. I had a total of 3 Thanksgiving Dinners this year, excluding the noodle feast I had with my mom on Thursday. I am blessed beyond blessed. Turkey is expensive and the time it takes to prepare one is precious as well. : ) G'day.

Thanksgiving Day 2008

My sister went to Knott's Berry Farm today. Thanksgiving this year is me, my mom, and noodles. But I love noodles.

Comic Books... I had no idea.

Batman material is still being published?

"On Wednesday, Batman's ultimate fate will be revealed in the latest issue of DC Comic's Batman.

Some have speculated that the caped crusader will suffer a horrific end when his sidekick, Robin, hops over to "the dark side" and destroys him in a terrible betrayal.

Others guess that he'll simply retire from his duties.

There's also buzz that he maybe killed by a mystery villain known as the Black Glove."

source: perezhilton.com

Gone Green

I've underestimated this world's potential to care about more than one thing at a time. A few years back when An Inconvenient Truth caught all kinds of national buzz, I thought to myself, world democracy > global warming. I knew our planet was dying but I believed the entire green-campaign was going to marginalize other, more important, global issues. Here I am, 3 years later, hopeful to live another generation's time and nostalgic of my summer in 2001 in the Monteverde Rainforesta in Costa Rica. I want my kids or my friends' kids, or if none of us have kids, then the neighbors kids, to witness nature's regenerative majesty. Just like how nature is so accessible now, it has to be that simple in the future. One plane ticket to Santiago, and you can get bit by black ants the size of penne pasta noodles! I say that because I'm eating some penne right now, and yes, I did see huge ants and they were beautiful!

I still haven't seen An Inconvenient Truth, and I probably never will. Regardless, I know its right to recycle, save energy, kiss the earth, blah blah, as do the rest of the world. People are smart these days, if not guilty. I'm afraid of what will happen when I don't recycle old papers in my office, considering half the staff are vegetarians, one a vegan. I respect vegetarians and vegans by the way. I was a vegetarian for a few weeks once, and it was such a healthy, glutton-freeing, experience.

Among other things... theres the issue of war that I hate myself for. If theres one thing people hate Bush for its his opportunistic, exploitative foreign policy. I call his executive leadership "killing two birds with one stone". Yeah, I do. Its so sad though, and I always always think to myself, can a non-violent state really exist in a defensive, retaliative world. I don't know. Last year I read two books on the Israeli-Palestine conflict, one from an Israelian point of view, and one from an Palestinean point of view. The latter was more convincing.
Have you heard that quote, it goes something like, "War is like a game, and people are the players, if no one wants to play, the game's over". That would bring me to my knees.

Yesterday I was channel surfing on the radio, and when I got to 107.9, I immediately heard "This world belongs to the devil."
I won't expound on that. Think whatever you like.

Anyways, Do your part. And remember to wish Happy Thanksgiving to people who are away from their families, like Orson Hwang who is stuck in Texas alone with no body. Ask him what his job title is. It's hardcore.

I am a Nehemiah Band Fan.

For those in the Christian community, I hope in the near future you get a chance to listen to and meet the guys of The Nehemiah Band - they are amazing people and amazing musicians.

www.myspace.com/thenehemiahband

I've seen their videos and I have a copy of their new CD, but none compares to the guts and glory of what they do live. They've got soul ya'll.

Also, I'm foolish for admitting this but I have the hugest crush on Mike Whang. Not because of his voice or his guitar skills, I'm not the groupie type, but there's definitely something special in his swagger and his depth. I sound very creepy, I know. Its because I am. He can never ever read this or else I'm going to die of embarrassment. Actually, I already did. Last week, I tried to talk to him during their album release party and I was nothing short of a nervous idiot. The band is performing at my old church Light & Salt Presbytarian in two weeks. I'll be praising front and center...with a mask on.


Light and Salt Presbyterian Church
25500 Vermont Ave.
Harbor City, CA
Saturday December 6
6:00-9:00pm


Un-relatedly,
My laptop died of overexhaustion last week and therefore I need help picking out a brand new one I probably can't afford. To Lenovo, or Not To Lenovo? Tonight I was at Powell's computer lab to work on some research but ended up watching the Clippers vs 76ers game online instead. Basically the Clippers were up for all of the second half until in the last minute of the fourth quarter, the traitor himself, Mr. Elton Brand knocked a 2 pointer to set the game at 78-79. Clippers got nothing done after Brand's basket... and then the 76ers won. Mike Dunleavy then proceeded to pick up a chair and....

... I wish.

Rob Bell - 017 Today

Deborah sent me a youtube link for one of Rob Bell's sermon videos (#18 "Name", so good), and I got to watching more of them. Each are about 10 minutes long and each probably speak to people in different ways. I found peace in number 17, "Today". 

Something about me,

I can forgive my past, including myself, and the people I used to know, but I can't forget. I can never be like Jesus, who easily forgives and forgets together in a moment's time. I hold on to ill memories like I need them. Clearly, I don't need them. They only make me dark and confused. 

I have a corrosive problem of believing that I'll always be this one person forever. That beneath my maturing body and spirit, my sins and habits will never change. And I'm also reminded of this, every single day, in other people. That phrase Some people never change comes to mind. It only takes one moment of mistrust, deceit, or let-down, for me to lose faith in humanity and the excellence of our being. Whom can I trust, but Jesus Christ...in context, those words sound so caustic and hateful don't they?

Yet its amazing how easily I can be reminded to be thankful for 'Today', all it takes is the local news, nostalgia over my grandma, a picture of a hungry child in North Korea. I will genuinely be thankful for my life. Everyone who has been humbled by His grace is able to do so with the upmost deference and shame. But at the same time, you and I both know, its only moments before such thanks withers away and we return to our lives we think we can author. 

I'm now sitting here thinking, what is the point of me stating the obvious. What am I going to do about it. Therefore I ask, help me - remind me of today, remind of Him, remind me that the past is in the past, hurt is in the past, and that today I'm going to engage with someone amazing, I'm going to eat a freakin feast, I'm going to laugh, and I'm going to be loved... just like you always do. (hint: i have good sisters and brothers)

Obama, LA TIMES

I'm currently at home for Veteran's Day.

My friend Liz was down in Torrance today coincidentally so we had some good italian at Fritto Misto in Hermosa Beach, 5 min from my house. I think there's one in Santa Monica also. It's a cool place because you can build your own pasta from like 40 different sauce choices, meats, veggies, herbs.

I had the Spinach Linguini with Italian Turkey Sausage, Carmelized Onions, Spicy Marinara, and Roasted Red Pepper. It was some serious heat! Fritto Misto is not your average Olive Garden btw. Its homey and saucy and good.

sososo...


courtesy of my camera phone

My mom came home from work with three L.A Times'! Her coworker waited in line for them and thought of us. My mom wouldn't let me sell it on ebay. "One for you, one for your sister, one for me", she said.

So, my mom and my dad both voted for Obama. Only after the fact, do they know I voted for McCain. My dad loves his mexican workers, wants immigration reform and is a self-proclaimed democrat.

You know, the media can only show so much footage of black people crying about Obama's win on TV. Maybe they could show some white people crying as well? Today on POWER 106, Obama went to far as to call in and say thanks to the station. A bit much ghetto, Barack! We definitely did not hear George W. Bush call JoJo on KIIS after his win in 2004!
Bad joke. sorry.

So now I've been reading what all the other countries are feelin about Obama's win.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/

CNN.COM/POLITICS is no longer of interest to you or me. Feel the wave of the win, on an international scale. It's insane how many endorsements Obama could've received from presidents and prime ministers around the world, although its good that he didn't acutally get them (like from Castro or Sarkozy who showed indirect support) or else McCain's camp would've played the socialist card and ran with it like mad!

oh fyi, I'm not blogging about politics. Like I previously mentioned in a past post, nothing is more tacky than political blogs. Even if your dad is the freaking Presidential Hopeful, you shouldn't be blogging about politics. I don't call *this* blogging about politics because I'm not expressing my conflictions with government or policy or the democrats, I'm simply stating what you already know and without any depth or intellect.

Happy V-Day. School resumes tomorrow.

I leave you with this.
"Now, It's no secret that I have been upset since the election. I've tried taking out my aggression on a punching bag but all the stuffing fell out after the first shotgun blast."
- Stephen Colbert 11/6/08

SF Weekend with Dragonboat

This year is my last year with UCLA Dragonboat.

Its been tough for me, balancing CCM and Dragonboat over the past four years, especially because committing to either is like committing to two separate families, time-wise, and relationship-wise, and its been so hard to find my place in both.

But finally, I think I can say I have made a home in my heart for my teammates. I love UCLA dboat because over the years I've seen that it breeds better people. Unity is something that Christians pray for in the church and for our immediate fellowships on campus...Unity in Christ's loving name. Interestingly, I have a greater sense of what unity is through my time with dboat than I've ever had with fellow Christians, and I say this, upliftingly - that good people are people who also pull together for each other.

Paddling is very different from other team sports in one distinct way. When you paddle in a synchronized boat with 19 other people, there can never be, for example, a Lebron or a Kobe. Also, there is an immense amount of personal accountability. Paddlers on the left, keep their partners on the right accountable for rotation, lean, breathing and stamina- vice-versa. Teammates in front and back of me make sure I'm pulling my maximum reach (to pull more water). When one person in the front of the boat loses their synchronization, the rest of the boat loses its synchronization as well. All this, for every stroke.

Physical accountability translates to more. I've learned to take criticism humbly for the benefit of my team. I've learned to give criticism constructively for the benefit of my team. I've learned to grunt and howl to pump others up in freezing weather or rain. After every 20 minute endurance piece around the marina, we always pat each other on the back, as we're desperately catching our breath.

We run miles together, we stretch together, we sweat together, we brunch together, we clean dirty boats together, we spot each other on the pull up bars, we celebrate (obscenely) after every win or loss... unity is always with us.



Dragonboat obviously is a no-name sport. There is absolutely no one to impress for doing it. (we know this, because the dragonball-z joke never gets old). So when we paddle and win races, we're really only doing it for each another. But that makes victories so much sweeter.

With that said,
this weekend we went to San Francisco to race in the annual College championships , and we won Gold in Division I!!!!



Some of the guys on the team are alpha-males, always running around shirtless... because they can I guess...result of rocking a sixpack, but this weekend, as we were huddled together, giving speeches in the cold, all of them were bawling tears alongside some of the girls. kawaii.

If I can take away one life lesson from my time with UCLA dboat when I graduate this year, its to love for people all of size, color, shape, or form simply because I'll be a better person for it you know what I mean? As much as a book, a prayer, or a quote can teach you something, the love of a brother is incomparable in influence.

I will wait, patiently. 

Clippers Tickets

The NBA was on fire tonight, Tony Parker with 55 points.... 

As for the Lakers vs Clippers game, I don't know whether to say that the Lakers played a weak first half or that the Clippers played stronger than usual.  Either way, I admit I had some hope at the end of the third quarter, with Al Thornton playing like an excited school girl. 

The Lakers bench just can't be beat. 

And Kobe was Kobe. did he honestly try to shoot from behind the basket... 

side note about Kobe, everyone is hating on his Guitar Hero commerical... I actually love it. The man looks good in pink. As for Michael Phelps.... he needs to stop getting in front of the camera! It drives me nuts!!! He was so bad on SNL right after the Olympics. The bad acting is unbearable! Stay underwater!

Anywhoos. I wanted to post a link to my friends website.
http://www.ckwriter.com/clippers.html

Basically, he has season tickets, and hes put all the games on display so that he could sell the ones hes unable to go to. 
His seats are so close! 

If you buy through me, he will give you a much better deal than what hes selling them for on craigslist. 

November26th, Clippers vs. Nuggets, I need a date! 

I love my new boots.

I admit that I've been lusting after the Frye Campus 14L boots for a long time. Maybe even over 2 years. They don't look that special, but trust me, they are VERY special. And they are expensive too, which is why my mother will beat me when she finds out how much I dished out for them.

100% genuine leather

hand-crafted by apache cowboys,
polished with the teardrops of unicorns,
these are some crazy special boots and I sleep in them every night.

Election 08'

I'm humbled to see this country in tears, with a sense of fulfillment, and hope upon Barack Obama's win over John McCain. Although I voted for McCain, and has been his staunch supporter even when back in March, his campaign was crumbling and his campaign strategists were leaving his side, I'm satisfied and I rejoice that the majority got what they wanted and most importantly, what they deserved. This election trully is historic, electorally speaking, Obama was able to get not only Pennsylvania, but Ohio, AND Florida as well. The Southern support for a democratic candidate has been immense this year, but again, I think Obama's Presidency is something that they not only wanted but that they deserved. Like many of you, I've been all but nerves these past 4 hours, watching election coverage on BBC, CNN, ABC, and listening to KCRW and AM 790 in the car (for Proposition updates). And also like some of you, I went to an "Election Party" to gather with people, to celebrate, and to pray for the future of our country. Like Paul writes to Timothy in Ephesis, I urge you to pray for ALL people, and "2 For kings and all who are in high positions", that they may lead us to live a "peaceful and quiet life, godly and dignified in every way".

I am so immensely proud of this country and proud to be one of it, especially during an election like this, where the people spoke, believed, and received.

I am proud to be an Angelino, to live in this city of Los Angeles, where God has called me to love the underpriveledged, the poor, my Latino neighbors, and my black neighbors. For the past four years, I have been a staunch supporter of Republican ideals, conservative ideals, and truth be told, George W. Bush. I've dreamt big global dreams, and prayed for democratization around the world, because while we Americans can peacefully, and patriotically exercise our freedoms, millions of the people around the world, simply cannot. In fact, many people in certain countries absolutely fear elections, because it is a time of violence and death. My prayers continue to go out to people without freedom. But Obama's victory today has given me a humbling reminder, that I must love my neighbor, and that there are many to pray for on American soil.

"This is good, and it is pleasing in the sight of God our Savior, who desires all people to be saved and to come to the knowledge ofthe truth." 1 Timothy 2:3-4.

God Bless America ya'lls!!!

P.S. Prop 2, makes our chickens and beef more expensive. Not cool. Why do chickens need hotels, they're gonna get the axe anyway.

Bills

Money from financial aid and my two jobs contribute to my rent, my gas, and my credit card bills. As of yesterday, life was dandy, as I always had enough money left over to pay for lacity parking tickets I get when I forget to move my car. But today I noticed that my mom has started using my checks to make my car payments. This means CRISIS. 

I have yet to become good at managing my money. Although I'm a thrifty shopper (live and die by the sales rack, costco, and ralphs club card sales), my vice is that I shop too frequently. Last month my sister cursed me out for being a shopoholic and although it was frightening to be cursed out, my habits did not change at all. 

What do I spend money on?

Presents for myself. Examples of presents include: grapes from Bristol farms (2.69/lb!), Godiva coffee, focusSmart vitamins from GNC, magazines from the newstand, 7.99 used dvds from Hollywood Video... useless things I love. They're not BIG purchases but they add up at the end of the month. I need to cut this out immediately.

Making money is fun at least. Maybe TOO fun. Maybe my problem is my actual source of income, though its not substantial. 

Ideology

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/26/opinion/26brooks.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

A Prayer

In every moment I am so graciously given in life, I wish I could seize them with vigor and courage. I so desperately wish to be brave yet I cower behind my insecurities, unfaithfulness, and shame. I am a prison to my past, shackled to ill memories I do not yet know how to let go of. Lord, give me courage. Would you make me brave. Lord help me to speak up! Make my actions loud as well!

Cover one eye!

Eeeks. I am such a stalker for these two. Even their dog is charming!
Sorry about the kissy picture. I like the second one better.

I love Coffee

You must buy a bag! $6.99 at CVS, I believe. 

My roommate and I also love Godiva Coffee. 




P.S. Caffeine is seriously bad for you. I should switch to decaf. GODIVA decaf.

Clipper Nation

Eric Gordon.



Rookie's doing well. And he fits in perfectly, as the Clippers remain to be the ugliest team in the NBA.

P.S. Today I had a Jalapeno Skin Burn! Look it up. It's real. It's vicious. My entire hand felt like it was on fire for a good 4 hours. And it started to spread to my palm and wrist. My fault for buying jalapenos from a hole-in-the-wall mexican meat market. Muy Caliente!

MLK Jr. Quote

"I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. That is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant."
- Martin Luther King Jr.

At my new internship, my boss had a speaker come in and facilitate a discussion about what non-violence and justice really mean on an attitudinal level, and he shared the above quote to us. Thought I'd share it with you.

I know, we, as jaded youth, have become desensitized to quotes like this, but every once in a while, we can read them, and appreciate the fact that they are true, that truth really exists in this ____ world.

More Charles Spurgeon

"I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord." —Philippians 3:8

Spiritual knowledge of Christ will be a personal knowledge. I cannot know Jesus through another person's acquaintance with Him. No, I must know Him myself; I must know Him on my own account. It will be an intelligent knowledge—I must know Him, not as the visionary dreams of Him, but as the Word reveals Him. I must know His natures, divine and human. I must know His offices—His attributes—His works—His shame—His glory. I must meditate upon Him until I "comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height; and know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge." It will be anaffectionate knowledge of Him; indeed, if I know Him at all, I must love Him. An ounce of heart knowledge is worth a ton of head learning. Our knowledge of Him will be a satisfying knowledge. When I know my Saviour, my mind will be full to the brim—I shall feel that I have that which my spirit panted after. "This is that bread whereof if a man eat he shall never hunger." At the same time it will be an excitingknowledge; the more I know of my Beloved, the more I shall want to know. The higher I climb the loftier will be the summits which invite my eager footsteps. I shall want the more as I get the more. Like the miser's treasure, my gold will make me covet more. To conclude; this knowledge of Christ Jesus will be a most happy one; in fact, so elevating, that sometimes it will completely bear me up above all trials, and doubts, and sorrows; and it will, while I enjoy it, make me something more than "Man that is born of woman, who is of few days, and full of trouble"; for it will fling about me the immortality of the everliving Saviour, and gird me with the golden girdle of His eternal joy. Come, my soul, sit at Jesus's feet and learn of Him all this day.

Closure

I like to believe I can take people's critisism, anger, and bitterness well (to a reasonable degree). Being a human being is frustrating sometimes, I get it. 

But rejection, separation, breakups, and endings - I lose all strength and dignity during those times. Every breakup or goodbye in my life has never ended peacefully or properly. Those people, like ghosts, haunt me, literally- everyday. They are people I care about but am not able to care for anymore. Relatives. Boyfriends. Friends. Classmates. To this day, I still feel the repercussions of failed relationships... no amount of forgiveness is ever enough. 

Closure done right is such an amazing thing. I've taken it for granted till now. 

Time is not healing. People always remind me that emotions run dry with time. "Things will get better in time", they always say. That has never been the case for me. Broken relationships are impossible for me to get over... maybe because I try to live against the grain of my parent's broken marriage which has fixated itself upon my past, present, and forever. I don't want a future of any more broken relationships. Not a single one more. It's my daily prayer. "Please God. Let their be unity in my future with everyone I come to know, with everyone I come to love".

Although I am ashamed, I am also grateful. Every failed relationship of mine has been an opportunity for me to become aware of my own vices, fix them, and eagerly wait for new chances to be good to the rest of God's people. God's people are good because we truly were made in his image. Yes, that image has been perverted over time but Praise Him, that true fellowship under God's name, can reflect his goodness and holiness. 

I love God's people and I really want to become a better person, to serve them and love them.

To the people of my past who haunt me on a daily basis, I can only pray that a window of opportunity may be created for real closure for us. I feel I deserve that much. I really don't want to be haunted anymore. But really... "it hurts when it heals too".

A few things I've learned about men...

1. Men like to win. They care whether their teams win or lose in preseason, they care about winning meaningless pickup ball games, they care about winning at Scrabble, they need to win debates, and games of logic. Winning even translates into their relationships. Men date women who make them feel like they've won. I don't know what they've actually "won" but for some strange reason, certain women can make men feel they're on top and certain women cannot. Not to say that winning versus losing is a bad thing. Its just that women don't care about it like men do.

2. Men like their space. Emotional space. Physical space. Time (space). Of course this is not always the case but while women can compromise their space for unwanted "girltalk" or a cramp 3-hour car ride without complaining, men can't seem to compromise their space for anything.

3. Men like ESPN. They like watching games, and then hours of commentary on those games, and then commentary on the commentary of those games. It's obvious that men like ESPN but not until recently have I realized that men really like it.

Bastille

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0I3mBzJGRIM&feature=related

Lobster Fest 08'

Norcal may have its annual Garlic Festival in Gilroy, but Socal rocks so much more hardcore with its beachside LobsterFest!!!  I went this weekend with my family while it was in Redondo Beach, and got to eat some really good New England lobster (lobsters from colder waters taste better, so my mom says). 

Including waiting in a long line to get our lobsters cracked open for us, we also watched a wakeboarding contest and a Bodyglove Bikini fashion show. Everyone was caucasian. Everyone was chugging beer. My sister doesn't eat seafood, so she bought a tri-tip sandwich from a random vendor for $9 bucks. Considering admission to the festival itself was $10 bucks, that sandwich technically cost $19. Yikes.

September 20, 2008

The Divine Commandment of Life

. . . be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect —Matthew 5:48

Our Lord’s exhortation to us in Matthew 5:38-48 is to be generous in our behavior toward everyone. Beware of living according to your natural affections in your spiritual life. Everyone has natural affections— some people we like and others we don’t like. Yet we must never let those likes and dislikes rule our Christian life. "If we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another" ( 1 John 1:7 ), even those toward whom we have no affection.

The example our Lord gave us here is not that of a good person, or even of a good Christian, but of God Himself. ". . . be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect." In other words, simply show to the other person what God has shown to you. And God will give you plenty of real life opportunities to prove whether or not you are "perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect." Being a disciple means deliberately identifying yourself with God’s interests in other people. Jesus says, "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another" ( John 13:34-35 ).

The true expression of Christian character is not in good-doing, but in God-likeness. If the Spirit of God has transformed you within, you will exhibit divine characteristics in your life, not just good human characteristics. God’s life in us expresses itself asGod’s life, not as human life trying to be godly. The secret of a Christian’s life is that the supernatural becomes natural in him as a result of the grace of God, and the experience of this becomes evident in the practical, everyday details of life, not in times of intimate fellowship with God. And when we come in contact with things that create confusion and a flurry of activity, we find to our own amazement that we have the power to stay wonderfully poised even in the center of it all.

Gardner's 8 intelligences

You've probably already read about this subject in one of your psycho-linguistic G.E. classes but I wanted to mention it briefly, because I find it really interesting and truthful.

Basically, in the past, researchers have referred to human intelligence as something measured by degree, and that everyone has a particular level of general intelligence, g.

but Gardner says, intelligence is multi-faceted.

His theory suggests there are 8 different types of intelligence.

1. Linguistic
2. Logical-Mathematical
3. Musical
4. Bodily-Kinesthetic
5. Spatial
6. Interpersonal
7. Intrapersonal
8. Naturalistic/Spiritual


What I'm most interested in, is number 6 and 7. Interpersonal intelligence- how well you know yourself. Intrapersonal intelligence- how well you know others.

If you dig deep into your social network and begin to analyze your friends, you'll realize that the people you care most about, and connect the best with, are the people who have similar levels of interpersonal and intrapersonal intelligence as you.

If you have a same-gender sibling, most likely he/she is the closest person to you. Not because they're your own blood and because they have no choice but to love you, but really, because you tend to see the world, morality, virtue, humor, etc, on the same level.

Well thats what I think at least.

Concerning the opposite sex...
Maybe you're attracted to someone because they're smart. (Logical-Mathematical)
Maybe he/she can sing or play the acoustic guitar real well (Musical)
and if you're a girl, maybe a guy is really attractive to you because of his athletisim. He plays the field well, regardless of the sport (Bodily-Kinistetic).

They are lots of factors that play into attraction.

But I think what truly connects people, and allows them to be mates for life... is their comparative degrees of interpersonal/intrapersonal intelligence. (of course spiritual as well).
Anything otherwise... and they're bound to butt heads and foster inner-frustration, passive-aggressiveness (so common among asians), and whatever else that occurs when you're stuck in a monogamous relationship that is making you unhappy for an unknown reason.

I dont know where I'm getting with this. I really don't have much of a point.

But yes, There IS such a thing as interpersonal and intrapersonal intelligence. In Korean its called "noon-chi". I'm sure its something that grows with maturity and experience, but you must agree with me on the fact that some people, really just don't have it.

Winding down

Summer, college, Bush's presidency, my youthful skin... 4 things I love (are coming to their ends!).

By college-student social standards, I've been pretty MIA this summer. By that I mean, no one knows what I've been doing because I have yet to document it all up on facebook photos. Just wait. It's coming.

I thought I would be extremely lonely this summer after disabling my facebook wall, and staying off AIM, but.. jk I didn't think that. But I did do it to prove a point (secret) to myself and I succeeded. That is all that matters.

A few things.

• I got a new apartment. Its hot! both literally and in the aesthetic sense of the word. The place gets no ventilation whatsoever. But its furnished with brand new goods and the carpets are clean!
• I got a new car. like. brand new. It's real pretty. Honda Clearance Sale came just in the nickerbockers of time!
  
• I got a new job. I didn't quit my day job though. Basically on lonely nights, you can catch me over at Century City mall, kissing customer arse at Armani Exchange. After my rent went up for moving to a nicer place, I had to get a second job. Its cool though... I love jumping into bed at night, exhausted - I get the best sleep that way.
  
• I picked up a new minor just so I could be a bruin for another year. I did NOT buy a den sports package for nothing ya'lls. Basically, I met with a counselor and he said "Get out of LA. You're done." But I said "No you can't make me!"
  I am now a Political Science Major with a minor in Civic Engagement.

Summer has been, stable, to say the least. I only have good things to boast about my summer simply because- nothing terrible happened- nothing emotionally wrenching enough to lock me up in a dark depression. I've been going to class everyday, working everyday, exercising when I can, spending time with family every weekend, going to church, going to bible study. All those things sound so ordinary but with all seriousness and thankfulness, they really are not. At least not this summer. At least not this season of my life.

I always complain about classes offered at UCLA (because really - some of them are so bogus. SO NOT worth the thousands of dollars SallieMae pays on mybehalf each year). They're are some good ones though. For instance, in my case, all the Political Theory classes I've taken have been gems. Life-shaping. I'm the kind of person who grows if someone else gives me something to live by. 100% of who you are is not what you do, but what you believe in. If you don't know what you believe in, go get brainwashed by someone who does.

My point: Session A was fun.

And work... lastyear my office clerk job at Anderson Business school was starting to become a drag, but this summer has been good because I've earned some respect in the office, and reached some substantial depth in the relationships with my bossess- so things are looking up. Armani Exchange is fun because the managers aka my boss ladies are like real-life Kim Kardashians! except much more professional and down-to- earth. One thing I've realized while working with my managers at Armani is that I connect best with women who share my passion for monogamy! You would think most people in this world share the same passion, but statistics, both in the world, and in the church, prove otherwise. Being in long-term relationships ain't that cool no more. (All my gorgeous sexy bossess have been in 3 year+, healthy, unregretful relationships. Its inspirational!).

Exercise. The campus gym closes at 10:45pm daily which is no bueno for me because thats usually when I get home every night after work, but pitch-black-Drake-stadium-at-11pm never fails me. During Session A, dragonboat kept me in check. Session C has been a little bit tougher, but I run and jump when I can.

Family. I'm so blessed to have my sister granted she and I verbally abuse each other ALOT. not with cussing, but with everything else thats brutal. I've realized the seriousness of our dynamics JUST this summer because we've been spending a lot of time together (we both have summer school and work on campus). It's a blessing in disguise. Usually the verbal abuse turns out to be truthful. I wouldn't take "the truth" humbly from anyone else but my own blood.
Our family has yet to take a family vacation. I think we're going to Sequoia. I just want some fresh air. That's all I ask.

Church. Sabbaths and Tuesday Night bible studies are the two days I look forward to the most during the week.

I've said a lot of "OhhhHhhh. THIS is what ____ actually means!" fill in the blank with... grace, Jesus, tabernacle, the law, Genesis 1:1, doxology, holiness (Anything and everything I thought I understood). I'm learning/experiencing so much through this tiny church situated in the middle of nowhere. James Choi likes to call it the boonies. I've also met some living, tangible, godly women and men, and they really give me faith in my own faith. My life/faith/happiness suffocates when I'm ever in the "PEOPLE SUCK!!!!!"phase. Our horizontal relationships affect your vertical relationship. Having a good community of role-models has done wonders in my life. PEOPLE ROCK!!!!!!!!!!

I have done nothing this summer to wow the boots off your socks except for school, work, church, and spending time with family. My life is still a dynamic one.

P.S. I think its kinda tacky to blog about politics but let me say one thing. Track Palin is a fine lookin gentleman! Peace be with him in Iraqattack.

Small article

http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/08/29/navarrette.obamaspeech/index.html?iref=nextin

Yancey, on writing, pleasure, and C.S. Lewis

"Lewis saw the world as a place worth saving. Unlike the monastics of the Middle Ages and the legalists of modern times, he saw no need to withdraw and deny all pleasures. He loved a stiff drink, a puff on the pipe, a gathering of friends, a Wagnerian opera, a hike in the fields of Oxford. The pleasures in life are indeed good, just not good enough; they are "only the scent of a flower we have not found, the echo of a tune we have not heard, news from a country we have never yet visited."

I found in Lewis that rare and precarious balance of embracing the world while not idolizing it. For all its defects, this planet bears marks of the original design, traces of Beauty and Joy that both recall and anticipate the Creator's intent.

Alone of modern authors, Lewis taught me to anticipate heaven: "We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea."

We writers are not nouns, he used to say. We are mere adjectives, pointing to the great Noun of truth. Lewis did that, faithfully and masterfully, and because he did so, many thousands have come to know and love that Noun.

Including me."

- Philip Yancey (from July's article of ChristianToday)

When I'm in Powell, studying with my sister, I treat myself to hours of magazine reading. You know, the usual- Redbrook...EBONY....
Don't waste your cash buying magazines like I've done for the past three years. Powell has a hefty collection, including ChristianToday, (where I read the above excerpt)- it's an evangelist publication. I note that because I opened a different Christian magazine and there was a happy spread about a lesbian priest from the eastcoast. Negative.

But I love the above excerpt because its an excellent reminder of what we Christians do best: compromise. And Yancey's article suggests that compromising (whatever it is that we unconsciously compromise) for the sake of pleasure, leaves no room for the glorying of Heaven, the ultimate good.

For the Win

Summer
Everything I hoped it would be and more.

It's definitely been a season of second chances in all the important realms of my life: family, friends, faith, dragonboat, school. I'm so thankful that life leaves room for mistakes, and the opportunity to pick myself up and try again.

Spending more time with my mom has been good for me because so far she's been a daily reminder for me to be strong. Spring quarter took a lash on my confidence, faith, and trust in humanity and myself. I was weak. I can't think of any other word more fitting.

Alicia Keys - Superwoman

Everywhere I'm turning
Nothing seems complete
I stand up and I'm searching
For the better part of me
I hang my head from sorrow
state of humanity
I wear it on my shoulders
Gotta find the strength in me

Those are the feelings I'm learning to leave. Freakin Alicia Keys, her songs, her music videos- they get the best of me.

In my life, peace comes and goes, comes and goes. For now, its resting at the center of me, and I'm trying my best not tamper with it before I lose it again.

But on a serious note, All Glory to the Author of second chances.

Updates:
Over the weekend, my team, UCLA Dragonboat, raced in what is called the 2008 Viewsonic Long Beach Dragonboat Festival (over 100 teams from everywhere), and we placed 1st in Division IIB out of 6 divisions. But more importantly we won GOLD in the College Division. Its so fun to win. And its such an indescribable feeling. Thank you to my breast friends for coming out to support me and not embarrassing me.

Secondly, and just as sweet, Mama bought me a brand new car baby! - Honda Accord, black, sedan, 2008. Definitely an upgrade from the Honda Accord I was already driving- white, sedan, 1989. Can't wait to drive you around town. Can't touch my stereo though.





...two blessings for which I will not take for granted! Hollatchagurlll

Joel 2:8

Charles Spurgeon

"Neither shall one thrust another; they shall walk every one in his path." —Joel 2:8

Locusts always keep their rank, and although their number is legion, they do not crowd upon each other, so as to throw their columns into confusion. This remarkable fact in natural history shows how thoroughly the a Lord has infused the spirit of order into His universe, since the smallest animate creatures are as much controlled by it as are the rolling spheres or the seraphic messengers. It would be wise for believers to be ruled by the same influence in all their spiritual life. In their Christian graces no one virtue should usurp the sphere of another, or eat out the vitals of the rest for its own support. Affection must not smother honesty, courage must not elbow weakness out of the field, modesty must not jostle energy, and patience must not slaughter resolution. So also with our duties, one must not interfere with another; public usefulness must not injure private piety; church work must not push family worship into a corner. It is ill to offer God one duty stained with the blood of another. Each thing is beautiful in its season, but not otherwise. It was to the Pharisee that Jesus said, "This ought ye to have done, and not to have left the other undone." The same rule applies to our personal position, we must take care to know our place, take it, and keep to it. We must minister as the Spirit has given us ability, and not intrude upon our fellow servant's domain. Our Lord Jesus taught us not to covet the high places, but to be willing to be the least among the brethren. Far from us be an envious, ambitious spirit, let us feel the force of the Master's command, and do as He bids us, keeping rank with the rest of the host. To-night let us see whether we are keeping the unity of the Spirit in the bonds of peace, and let our prayer be that, in all the churches of the Lord Jesus, peace and order may prevail.

On complications of passion, following your heart...

“The heart has its reason of which reason knows nothing”

Home again

Hope you got to relax on the 4th.

I went to visit my dad - had a shot of soju with him to celebrate my birthday and the beginning of my 9 year journey through the tumultuous 20s. To think... marriage, salaries, independence, all lie ahead. Its frightening because all of those things seem so beyond my control. Another possibility is not having any of those things. I've never worried about anything in my life. We'll see how that philosophy plays out when I'm alone, confused, and poor.

Friday night, I celebrated the 4th at the Hollywood Bowl with my mom and my sister. This year the Bowl decided to celebrate the Dodgers 50th anniversary. Tommy Lasorda came on stage halfway through the concert - told some wild jokes, rallied an applause for the U.S. troops, asked us to pray for him and the team, and then led the crowd through "Take Me Out To the Ballgame". He was patriotic I guess, in a rambunctious, catholic-fevered way. I thought he was going to start blabbering. At one point he said "Isn't this great! I got the philharmonica behind me..." I was hoping he'd start cursing the Giants or something but sadly he left the stage and then Randy Newman came on.

Each of us enjoyed the night for different reasons. My mom will only buy Bowl tickets if there are fireworks at the end. Last summer we sat through Gladys Knight all for the sake of fireworks GG umma. My sister loved the night because she just loves music I guess. She knows stuff about the L.A. Phil. I don't know anything. I enjoyed the night because, well, I believe American tradition exists, and it was good to celebrate it- American music (Copland, Gershwin), baseball (They played a recording of Vin Scully's play-by-play of Kirk Gibson's gamewinning homerun), film (Field of Dreams, and whatever the Robert Redford movie was. Robert Redford is just an American icon period).

There were a lot of Jewish families there. I know that I was surrounded by them in my section. I'm glad Jews love their country.

As for me, I could never put my nationality over my ethnicity, but I probably love America more than you. We can have a U.S. history battle to prove it. Or I'll give you a rundown of all the presidential races since Kennedy. Primaries and all.

One thing for certain is that you love the Dodgers more than me. But I know that since I'm from LA and since I call myself an American, I should at least get excited about them. At least I recognized Tommy Lasorda when he stomped onto the stage and at least I recognized Vin Scully's famous world series announcing.

I'm going to the Dodger game this Wednesday. At least I know that since the Padres beat the Diamondbacks today, the Dodgers have a good shot at taking the lead.

As for the players names?
I'm more interested in the season-ending sale at Banana Republic.

They paved paradise and put up a parking lot.
-Joni Mitchell

God.

Best Guilt-Free Snacks

I don't want to eat gunk, nor do I crave it. I fasted again over the weekend and it brought me back to eating healthy again.

I want to share some of my favorite snacks. Guilt-free and GOOD.




Mi-Del Swedish Style Gingersnaps. They're rock hard. They literally snap when you eat them opposed to the softer kind. Glutten-free. You can find these in the organic section of any grocery store.




Snackmasters Turkey Jerky. Healthier and 98% fat free compared to regular beef jerky. I like this brand, cuz the jerky is really soft.


Pirate's Booty White Chedder. Some people don't like chedder. They make it in caramel and BBQ which are really good too. (Healthier alternative to potato chips).



Kettle Chips Spicy Thai. Sweet + Spicy + Salty. Addicting.



Barbara's Puffins Cinnamon. It tastes better as a snack, opposed to eating it as cereal with milk. Lots of fiber. Wheat free.



Chex Mix - Dark Chocolate. Self explanatory. Soooo good. Theres definitely crack-cocaine in this.



Flat Earth Tangy Tomato Ranch Veggie Chips. It has so much flavor, you wouldn't guess they're organic and msg free. I can eat an entire bag in one sitting. no good. These are my favorite chips.




El Sabroso Guacachips. It doesn't even taste like avocados. But regardless, they are so freakin good.

India baby girl deaths 'increase'

I don't care much for headlines but the girl in me cringed at this one

| Many families now use ultrasound scans and abort female fetuses, despite the existence of the 1994 law banning gender selection and selective abortion.

Six Flags Magic Mountain

X2 was great. We waited 2.5 hours in 95 degree weather for the damn thing.


Roommates and I on Viper,



All of our happiness is fake.
"... Ow it hurts, Ow! .... OWW, ow, T-h-i-s....   r-i-d-e....    s-u-c---CAMERA!!!"

Damien Rice - Cannonball

L.A. Film Festival

I love film, experiencing someone else's compelling intuition...and how it can change a part of me for good. Westwood's serial number of run-down, business-less, movie theaters are being put to good use this week. (Honestly, some of the stores in Westwood, theaters included, surmount to a waste of space! ie/ the Beauty supply chains, Ann Taylor?, Curves?!, etc.)

I checked out the ticketing office today. Every flick, Short films included, cost about 12 bucks each. EACH. That means it still costs 12 bucks to see a 6 minute indie. In two weeks they're holding a special premiere for Hellboy II. A ticket to that is $100. To drop a bill or not to drop a bill? Jk I'm not that stupid. But I'm jealous of those who are.

L.A. is so expensive.

I hate/love you Hollywood.

Happy 21st to my Roommate Monique

Monique. <--- Google Image search for "Monique"
Sadly, my roommate is not a sista, but a sist-er. "In christ". Boring.

A versatile woman. Gangsta, matron, princess, bamf, and friend.





(us on the tram to Disneyland)

Gasobe

Come to me and I will give you rest

Come to Me . . . —Matthew 11:28
"Where sin and sorrow stops, and the song of the saint starts. Do I really want to get there? I can right now. The questions that truly matter in life are remarkably few, and they are all answered by these words— "Come to Me." Our Lord's words are not, "Do this, or don't do that," but— "Come to me." If I will simply come to Jesus, my real life will be brought into harmony with my real desires. I will actually cease from sin, and will find the song of the Lord beginning in my life.

. . . and I will give you rest"— that is, "I will sustain you, causing you to stand firm." He is not saying, "I will put you to bed, hold your hand, and sing you to sleep." But, in essence, He is saying, "I will get you out of bed— out of your listlessness and exhaustion, and out of your condition of being half dead while you are still alive."

- Oswald Chambers

Also, I agree with this

"After the first encounter with love, there is no doubt you pursue love with a passion....No mountain seems too high to climb over and no field seems too wide to run through when you're in love.

But somehow, even while in love, you're still left looking. Looking for what? You don't know. But whatever it is you're looking for, you realize it's yet to be found. What a frustrating place that is to be, to be in love but yet know that your heart is not completely satisfied. An odd guilt takes over perhaps, or maybe a sense of apathy as you grow numb to knowing that whatever you try while in love, you'll be left feeling like you still haven't found it, whatever "it" is.

I think for those of us who suffer from this don't actually need to be reminded that love is more than an emotion and that emotions come and go, because the frustration of feeling like you don't have what you're looking for even while having love is something that lives on even when you know in your mind all the deeper facts and truths about love."
- Paul Kim (fellow West High alumn aka James Choi's husband), on 1 John 4:16: God is love.

Arthur W. Pink (1975)

"Acquaint now thyself with Him, and be at peace: thereby good shall come unto thee" (Job 22:21)

"Thus saith the Lord, Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom, neither let the mighty glory in his might, let not the rich glory in his riches: But let him that glorieth glory in this, that he understandeth, and knoweth Me, that I am the Lord" (Jeremiah 9:23-24)

"Something more than a theoretical knowledge of God is needed by us. God is only truly known in the soul as we yield ourselves to Him, submit to His authority, and regulate all the details of our lives by His holy precepts and commandments. "Then shall we know, if we follow on (in the path of obedience) to know the Lord" (Hosea 6:3). "If any man will do His will, he shall know" (John 7:17). "The people that do know their God shall be strong" (Daniel 11:32)"





Finals Week.

What Lies Ahead

The circus that made history.


But the domination begins.



Or has it already begun.

Stewardship, lack of.

I am behind on everything.

relationships, homework, studying, birthdays, responsibilities.

Just an update

I smell summer.

Basic plans.

Session A & C (living in 10911 Rochester for Session A and then we're officially moving out and Kat and I will begin our hunt for a studio/single)
I'll be taking Education and Film classes. For funzies. Financial aid is extremely generous during the summer.
I'll also be working 2 jobs. Dolla dolla bills ya'll (bad Wyclef Jean song). I have to pay the rent for both my sister and I.

So I'm not going on missions, studying abroad, building houses, feeding infants. I'll be right where I want/need to be, safeguarding the city of angels, preserving all its goodness (purging it of all things norcal).

Possible Trips (unfortunately none are extended vacations)

I promised myself I would make a Shnorcal trip between sessions to visit friends. Anyone is welcome to hitch a ride. Hopefully I'll be visiting San Jose (Yeri), Walnut Creek (Lizzie), San Francisco (Anita).


Also. Day trips to

I'm gonna go twice if I can. Three, if money rains from the sky.
Mickey misses me! Currently my Minnie doll is sitting in the backseat of my honda with the seatbelt on. Joy ride!

Other than that I'm gonna be spending more time at my church that I love, going to concerts with my sis, exploring LA with friends, converting people to McCainians, hiking and biking when I can, balling at Veteran Park (love & basketball baby), and paddling for UCLA Dragonboat summer crew. You MUST come watch me race. No, I will NOT be fighting Goku and Gohan, please take me seriously.

I'm pretty willing to do almost anything this summer if my finances and time will allow for it. My summer seems moderately uneventful, but most of my time will be sucked up by class and work. Film classes alone are 4 hours long, twice a week. I can't wait! t o t a k e n a p s i n t h e m.

There is less than 2 weeks left of school for Bruins.
Drop your fruits like a ripe tree.

btw, earlier today, I made the ultimate folk/alternative/acoustic playlist during my study break. Mixtape! (aka burned cds), when I force it into your hands, please give it a chance.

9 Blessed are the peacemakers

Pictures of My 2nd Favorite Senior Class

My ultimate favorite class is Jon Shieh's year. Sorry.

But here's the link to my photo album. Blogspot is sucky when it comes to picture posting.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/tammyleephotos/sets/72157605229914668/

Sorry that most of them are of me.

Women

"Do women think it feminine to be so illogical or can't they help it?"
- Cary Grant

Home

Friday mornings, my entire apartment is up by 8:00am. Last night Deborah and Monique bought a GIANT chocolate cake from Ralphs (literally took up half the freezer. Probably could feed 8-10) to drown their failed midterm into gluttonous oblivion. Kat ate like 1/4 of it. The cake even had a name, "Chocolate Fudge Fantasy".

Having a tiny apartment forces my roommates and I to constantly be all up in each other's biznass. We always study in the living room together. We are each other's wake up calls. We eat our meals on the futon because we have no room for a dining table. If I roll out of bed and take one step forward, I'm practically spooning with Deborah. My desk blocks the bathroom door. My closet is a joke and you know me.... I have way too much clothes, let alone shoes. bags. bras. whatever. There is NO space in this apartment!

But I cannot imagine leaving this shack.
I love that the entire living room wall consists of 2 large windows that almost reach the floor. In the day time our apt looks like a NY loft. The building straight across is made of brick walls. Very eastcoasty. Vaccuming would probably take less than 10 minutes (if we actually cleaned).

Initially we all agreed to move out of this hobbit hut and find a new place for next year. In that process 2 of my roommates got nabbed by jeeyoon and jaclyn and then Kat and I decided we were going to move into a single or studio. (fyi there was no drama there. just, deborah and I have known each other for 18 years and I think we both realized we can't be conjoined at the hip forever).

Now Kat and I have to build a new home together. Newlywed status.
Bottom line is SINGLES are expensive. At least 1600. Thats 800 a person. I currently only pay 508 a month. And my paycheck BARELY pays for even that.

So Kat and I are trying to find a way to get a third person to move into the hobbit hut we already live in. 10911 Rochester for life.
But this person has to be AWESOME. Like MIND-BLOWINGLY AWESOME. Its hard to top the dynamics we had with deb and mo. (it sucks because lately our apartment has been getting along really well. spicegirls status... and we only have 1 more month left together)

For me, home is wherever the good food is.
At my home in Torrance, my mom has nothing in the fridge except diet coke and Costco salad. If I ever do go to Torrance, I always stop by Trader Joe's first to get food to cook at home for my family. My mom hates cooking.

Cooking is my number 1. You will often find me at stores like Williams & Sonoma and Sur La Table, longingly caressing the panini-press, or the Wusthof knife set, stuff I can't afford but imagine myself using. No I'm not a domestic diva. I just think the best food is the kind you make yourself. No MSG. I have my step mom and my ex boyfriend to thank for this. My stepmom believes its absolutely necessary to own 3 freezers and 2 fridges. Which is exactly what we have plus a huge manmade firepit in the backyard. My ex-bf went to culinary school and could never shutup about food.


Currently I'm in fullerton with my dad. I JUST went on a crazy journey through Walnut, Diamond Bar, and Buena Park, to drop all my small group girls at home. Traffic is death. (Thank goodness for my pimple mobile that barely eats up gas). And to my luck when I came home my dad was bbqing outside! Firepits > Charcoal grills.

Now I'm just trying to relax.
I'm on my sister's comp.
My dogs are sleeping at my feet.

Tomorrow I will probably run at the lake, have lunch with dad, then head back to LA to go to the beach with Kat! I'm gonna try to go into the ocean this time. 15 page research paper on U.S. libertarianism, you can wait.


Good night ya'll. I'm tired. See you on the dance floor. (Dormal! Going stag is a sad thing, but thus is my life)