To Hate Sin and Love Holiness

"He shall save His people from their sins." — Matthew 1:21

Many persons, if they are asked what they understand by salvation, will reply, "Being saved from hell and taken to heaven." This is one result of salvation, but it is not one tithe of what is contained in that boon. It is true our Lord Jesus Christ does redeem all His people from the wrath to come; He saves them from the fearful condemnation which their sins had brought upon them; but His triumph is far more complete than this. He saves His people "from their sins." Oh! sweet deliverance from our worst foes. Where Christ works a saving work, He casts Satan from his throne, and will not let him be master any longer. No man is a true Christian if sin reigns in his mortal body. Sin will be in us--it will never be utterly expelled till the spirit enters glory; but it will never have dominion. There will be a striving for dominion--a lusting against the new law and the new spirit which God has implanted--but sin will never get the upper hand so as to be absolute monarch of our nature. Christ will be Master of the heart, and sin must be mortified. The Lion of the tribe of Judah shall prevail, and the dragon shall be cast out. Professor! is sin subdued in you? If your life is unholy your heart is unchanged, and if your heart is unchanged you are an unsaved person. If the Saviour has not sanctified you, renewed you, given you a hatred of sin and a love of holiness, He has done nothing in you of a saving character. The grace which does not make a man better than others is a worthless counterfeit. Christ saves His people, not in their sins, but from them. "Without holiness no man shall see the Lord." "Let every one that nameth the name of Christ depart from iniquity." If not saved from sin, how shall we hope to be counted among His people. Lord, save me now from all evil, and enable me to honour my Saviour.

Charles Spurgeon

Whose respect do we live for?

What has been like water from the well of Bethlehem to you recently? Love, friendship, spiritual blessing? Then at the peril of your soul you take it to satisfy yourself. If you do, you cannot pour it out before the Lord. How am I to pour out spiritual gifts, or natural friendship, or love? How can I give them to the Lord? In one way only- in the determination of the mind, and that takes about two seconds. If I hold spiritual blessings or friendship for myself they will corrupt me, no matter how beautiful they are. I have to pour them out before the Lord, give them to Him in my mind, though it looks as if I am wasting them, even as David poured the water out on the sand, to be instantly sucked up.

The Birkman Method

I've been working at UCLA Anderson for over a year and a half now and recently my work-study job transformed into an "internship". I have exactly the same responsibilities but now we are no longer allowed to use facebook in the office.

my work place.
The annual budget for this particular office in Anderson is only about 7 million dollars. I know this because much like NBC's The Office, everyone can hear everything, including the things we don't wish to hear. I don't work with the accounting or sales department so I don't know how much a week's worth of lectures cost, but I do know the cost of some other expenses; One example: before the recession hit the office used to spend $1000 a week on coffee for the executives who attend our programs. At one point we even had a Starbucks coffee machine... My emphasis here being, executives will shovel over thousands just to have a corporate experience. (I still can't get over it. $1000 bucks for coffee. My god)

But here's something interesting (still expensive), all the executives who attend programs also get to take $475 personality tests called The Birkman Method. Look it up if you're curious. It's a 250 question test that takes about 45 minutes and results in a 68 page spread of analysis on effective behavioral style, organizational focus, interests, stress triggors, etc. Basically, a person who takes the test can find out their strengths and weaknesses in relation to working for a company.
Every week I print dozens of results and prepare them for program participants. Last week, the office had all the interns take them too.

In the test, people result in 1 of 4 categories/colors.

Expediting - Doers (Operations/Technology)
Communicating - Talkers (Sales/Marketing)
Administrating - Counters (Admin Fiscal)
Planning - Thinkers (Design/Strategy)



I am still awaiting my $475 results.

5000 Calories in a day

The Superbowl did not let down this year.

Highlights

• Harrison passing out in the endzone after making the longest sprint of his life

"Why is Harrison down? Did he fall on his neck?"
"No he's just fat and out of breath"
The Steelers switch from defense line to an offensive caravan was crazy too.

• Anquan Boldin's 45-yd catch. Nothing special I guess. I'm just a fan. (The few times I watched Monday night football this year, key word being few, I was watching the Cardinals because of him. No juggernaut action displayed in this game though)

• My favorite: Bruce Springsteen slamming his crotch into the stage camera during halftime
  

• Warner's pass to Fitzgerald in the 4th quarter (9:00) even though Fitzgerald had 6 guys on him. Warner really didn't want to pass to anyone else.

• And of course Holmes' impressive touchdown completion, oddly resembling Ray Lewis' ballet stunts from the Sobe Lean commercial a few minutes before. The pass was more impressive than the catch though.

Anyways. I only got one hour of sleep last night. I stayed up studying for a midterm, writing a paper, and then at 5am this morning, I had to go into my work to help out with mid-year inventory. Here's where I'll begin to document my calorie intake.

5am: Blueberry Bagel with cream cheese
9am: McDonald's DELUXE Big Breakfast with Orange Juice and Coffee (Deluxe includes pancakes and bacon) (1000?)
4pm: Bacon-wrapped Downtown LA hot dog (600 calories?)
5pm: 2 Filet Mignon Sliders (At least 800 calories each) The guys at my church, including my pastor, are amazing chefs.
6pm: Sausage Penne Pasta
8pm: Slice of white birthday cake
10pm: Big Chill - Mocha Custard Fudge Frozen Yogurt with Gummi Bears

All this with my metabolic energy at Zero.

I normally don't eat this much but if someone offers me food I don't like to refuse. Especially if they've put in a lot of hard work. Like, my pastor - He bakes his own bread from scratch!

Anyways... I have an incredibly busy week but I won't let RESTAURANT WEEK go by without a taste.

http://www.dinela.com/restaurantweek/

Phillis Wheatley

On Being Brought from Africa to America (1773)

Twas mercy brought me from my Pagan land,
Taught my benighted soul to understand
Thatt there's a God, that there's a Saviour too:
Once I redemption neigher sought nor knew.
Some view our sable race with scornful eye,
"Their colour is a diabolic die."
Remember, Christians, Negros, black as Cain,
May be refin'd and join the'angelic train.

- Phillis Wheatley

A year since.

April 4, 1979 - January 22, 2008


I miss Heath!

Quote from Revolutionary Road

"Come on tell me the truth Frank. Remember that? We used to live by it...and you know what's so good about the truth? Everyone knows what it is however long they lived without it. No one forgets the truth Frank, they just get better at lying."

- April Wheeler

Nina Simone - Wild Is The Wind

"You fought. You loved. You lost. Still, stand tall."

"Its loves illusions, I recall"

A friend recently told me something that has, for better, given me a sense of remote freedom. She reminded me to not live my life thinking that people belong to me, or I to them. And it's true. No one is really mine to keep, to control, or hope to change. Truthfully, I can't say that I've ever had a relationship I've never been possessive of.

If life were fair, relationships would be mutual, and people would give as much as they take. If life were pure, the people I love would love me too. Instead, somewhere between our innocence and urge, things have become messy. I don't know exactly when my relationships started becoming work, and while I believe everyone should adhere to such a principle, I've found that lately I've been working for nothing, if I've even been working at all. Instead I've been holding on to people just for the sake of holding on. For history's sake, I'll tell myself.

When it comes to logic and the quantity vs. quality of things, quality trumps all. At least, its supposed to. But even though there's clearly a right way and a wrong way to love someone and be loved, I've refused to let my conscience be my guide. People just want to go by what they feel. That is why some commitments are just unexplainable. We don't know why we still care, we just care. I guess that's supposed to mean you're alive, and you're human. We feel warm and real for it.

I'm glad life is so much more than that. Its always been easier for me to mindlessly pine than not pine at all...than lose everything I've ever had with someone. I chose to be mindless because, well, the latter is absolutely terrifying. For literally, goodness' sake, I think it's necessary that I let go. In the end its what I owe myself. And I say 'the end', because I know my life is about to change. With working life ahead of me (who knows what and where), I know there are certain people I'm never going to see again but will still want to hold on to. When that time comes around I'll remind myself to let go. I'm still learning though. It's hard. But I'll do whatever it takes if it'll make me more free.

Slumdog Millionaire

I had so much fun watching this film. I was so engrossed that I sat on the edge of my seat the whole time. I loved the original score http://www.amazon.com/Slumdog-Millionaire-Original-Soundtrack/dp/B001LX0JK6 , made me want to Tunak Tunak.

But in all seriousness, Slumdog had one of the best protagonists I've seen in a movie in a long time. Meet him and you'll be forever inspired to live for what is pure and true.

No Nonsense.

Getting the NBA League Pass for his birthday.

Drama, The World That They Live In

I'm watching korean dramas again. Mysoju.com is so awesome!



www.mysoju.com/the-world-that-they-live-in/

This drama has made me realize that I too have a really bad short temper, one which you'll never see, but fyi, its short and its terrible.

Benjamin Button

Nothing like F. Scott Fitzgerald's short story, but it was just as meaningful nonetheless. Eric Roth wrote a terrific screenplay paralleling his work for Forest Gump. The cinematography definitely would've gone to waste without the bits and pieces of Benjamin's narrative. Sadly, I can't remember a single thing that was said. I hope to see the screenplay up on the web soon.

I have to note that in Fitzgerald's original story, there is no such character named Daisy, though Benajmin does get married to a woman who Fitzegerald describes as "beautiful as sin". I want to assume the name Daisy was taken from Fitzegerald's The Great Gatsby, in which a certain Daisy Buchanan was the love of Gatsby's life. Tragedy in literature makes for great cinematic characters don't they.

And who knows why the story takes place in New Orleans and involves Hurricane Katrina. Fitzgerald's story takes place in Baltimore.

Well, David Fincher took a curious idea and certainly ran with it, ran with it far. I really loved the movie. Audiences will take away exactly two things upon watching the film: the first, that life is to be lived to the fullest, second, that Brad Pitt looks damn good in aviators and leather jackets.

Good night.

New Year's Eve 2008 continued...

New Year's Eve 2008

It was so great to spend New Year's at church this year. Some of the sisters and I combined our creative forces and planned a party/service in a span of 3 days. Decorations were the best part, especially with a limited budget. Pictures to come. Pictures to come.

I guess I just want to blabber about my night.

So, I've never been behind the mic before in my life, but I ended up MCing. Only fitting (tackling a big fear for the start of a New Year). After a hearty and spicy catered meal (at 9:30pm!), we played a game of Pictionary which included a festive twist. All the clues were the top news, entertainment, and sports headlines of 2008. Sounds like a dud-game but it was a hit. No one was able to recall who won the World Series this year, but somehow people were able to guess the Russia-Georgia war. That's very typical of our congregation. We have a lot of artists, intellects, and newsjunkies. Apparently no baseball fans.

My pastor gave a short sermon about Joshua... I will serve the Lord....a resolution to trump all other resolutions. Then we had this awesome time of reflection, open mic, in which we shared about how God has moved through us this past year through our church, All Nations Chapel. Sharing openly is such an easy thing to do with a small congregation. 'Twas a success. Even some of a big, hunky, intimidating brothers spilled their souls. So encouraging to see what God has done in people's lives.

Then we moved onto paired prayer. I got closer to someone tonight. My favorite.

The countdown itself was so much fun. We had horns and poppers and hats and little champagne glasses for toasting! Poppers are so fun. I wish there were more occasions where poppers are appropriate because they're SO much fun.

We ended the night with cake and corporate cleaning!

Oh we also had an amazing professional photobooth, courtesy of one our brothers. Umbrellas and all. Studio shots!

I hope your night was as glam, meaningful, and fun as mine. Even if you were out getting crazy drunk somewhere, I hope you were with good friends and family! People are so important. I hope the people in your life push you to be better and challenge you to be at your best. I call it tough love, also, my favorite.

Happy Entirely New Year Wow. Tomorrow my family is having traditional ddukgook and watching Benjamin Button.